"Did you win Mama?"

I have never been a person who has followed a map, made a grocery list, obeyed the rules, or just made the right choice the first, second, or third time around.  I am a procrastinator who tries to take short cuts but ends up going the wrong way .  I am a sensitive person who cries a lot and is always worrying about something.  I am labeled the "Drama Queen" in my family and I have yet to see anyone else wear the crown as good as I do.  I got pregnant when I was 23 years old, then got married, then separated 5 months after we wed, and finally I got divorced.  The story is a lot longer than that but this is the short and sweet version.  I will save you the details on the Honeymoon at Sea World. The most important part of this story is that I got pregnant! It was unexpected and hurt the people I love the most, but Morgan is the most amazing little boy and he has changed me for the better.  I tell him all the time that God blessed me the day he was born.  I know I sound like a Hallmark card but I am just being honest.  Because I like to do things backwards and take the accidental long route, I was 28 when I finally got my bachelors degree.  It was a long road of working a full time job, raising my son, and going to class at night. I would do homework after Morgan had gone to bed and sometimes stay up until early morning. I thought that I would never finish and seriously thought about giving up on school.  I have quit lots of things in my life but I am trying to break that habit.  During this time there was a lot of frustration, and hiding in my closet crying, and just wanting to say forget it!  I could not have finished without my parents help and pushing me to better myself.  It was also so important to me that my son see me finish something!  In December of 2009 my graduation had come and I have to say that putting on that cap and gown was well worth all the frustration and all the tears.  I have not done too many things in my life that I am proud of, but there are two things that I am proud of myself for.  They are being a mom and graduating from college.  As I walked into the huge venue where the graduation was being held I saw my dad crying, my mom cheering, and my son smiling. After my named had been called, the pictures with family had been taken, and hugs were shared, everyone left.  Morgan and I were the last to leave and as we walked to my car I had my cap in one hand and Morgan's hand in the other.  He was silent as we walked with a very serious look on his face and then he stopped, looked up at me, grinned and asked, "Did you win Mama?".  I looked down at him and could feel the warm tears fall down my cheeks and with a smile on my face I said, "Yes baby, I did win".  So the lesson that I have learned is that no matter how hard the journey is, if you finish, you win.